Are you a rescuer? Change your perspective and shift away from your old role

Change your perspective and change your life!

What you see, hear or feel isn't always all there is...

When you look at someone as needing to be rescued you may be viewing them as incapable. You may be viewing them as in lack, as helpless or as weak. ETC.

Instead, view them as warriors in training.

View others as warriors going through a “rites of passage” so to speak.

View them as capable people in training.

View them as a student in the school of life and they are cramming for an exam.

View them as skill building. View them as if they are on a tool gathering hunt.

But view them as holistic people at different places on their path of life and as equals and as worthy.  

Sure, you can offer assistance but if you offer a hand out instead of a hand up, you stop their opportunities from being fully realized.

Teach people how to pray (or chant or practice some from of affimative spiritual practice), how to play, how to learn and how to work smart instead of hard and you will develop empowered communities.

According to thefreedictionary.com  

res·cue  (r s ky )

tr.v. res·cued, res·cu·ing, res·cues

1. To set free, as from danger or imprisonment; save. See Synonyms at save¹.

2. Law To take from legal custody by force.

n.

1. An act of rescuing; a deliverance.

2. Law Removal from legal custody by force.

Truly to rescue an able bodied capable adult will not free them it will imprison or enslave them to dependency and or to debt. It will also do the same to you.

Most people rescue because they feel bad. When you rescue most often in makes you feel better in that moment. Yet the pain created in the long run for you and the person or the people you are rescuing can be far worse. There is a big difference between a hand out and a hand up. A hand up comes with guidelines that serve the greater good as well as serving the big picture.

A rescuer giving a hand out can feel used, taken for granted or of little value, etc.

The recued can feel insignificant, worthless, shame, guilt, in debt etc.

Both being rescued and rescuing can create the same emotions and consequences in life for each regardless of the role. It can create a wave of lack for all.

As a rescuer you are not doing great selfless acts of service you are doing selfish acts of service. You could be creating a dependency that others can end up becoming disabled by and in the long run they can resent you for it.

A hand out can cause others to lose the lessons they may have gained had they worked things out on their own or simply suffered the losses; they can feel insecure and unsure of how to handle similar situations in the future because they did not gain that skill this time around. They can also feel that all failures are theirs and all successes belong to the rescuer when they receive a hand out.

A hand up will create an option that makes to person or the people you are assisting feel better about who they are and what they are doing.  

One of the most powerful ways to change your role as rescuer with others is to change your perception. When you change how you look at a situation the situation will change. With a hand up, the recipients will feel empowered. They will see all failures and success as theirs. They will have the opportunity to grow and learn.

Suffering or challenges often hold important lessons. Challenges or obstacles are often in our lives to help us to grow and or develop skills. We can learn that we are truly strong, smart, wise, capable etc from such lessons and growing opportunities. When we allow others to work through their issues in their way and in their time, as well as allow them to deal with all of the consequences we in turn allow them the opportunity to grow and to learn. We also allow them the opportunity to see their own greatness and celebrate fully each success as their own.

 As well, when we do not rescue, we get to become the observer and expand our own growth. We get to learn by seeing how others deal with challenges. And more importantly we get to see that they can deal with challenges

I heard once “sometimes cruelty is the strongest form of compassion”.

Compassion is not just about stopping immediate pain in others or in us. It can very well be about allowing the small suffering now so that many small sufferings or large sufferings will be alleviated or minimized in the future.

Wouldn’t it be an act of cruelty to make such causes that creates great suffering in someone’s life? Wouldn’t it also be cruel to rob someone of a lesson or skill building opportunity that is essential to life?

Teaching someone how to stand on their own, how to fall with minimal damage and how to come back from temporary setbacks is an act of compassion. Teaching them to and allowing them to celebrate life is a true form of compassion.

The tree stands tall and strong because it has endured the winds, the fierce storms and the changing of seasons. It stands bending and dancing in the storms seeming to be creating a poetic motion. The tree does not seem to weep or break with the stress of the weather, it has learned to flex and to root itself deeply so that it is usually unaffected even by the harshest of weather.

The big trees that have lived long full lives, that are deeply rooted and highly flexible did not get this way by growing inside sheltered from the world. Yet in their greatness they can offer shelter to those in need for a temporary moment. The tree never offers a hand out, only a hand up.

Learn how to set boundaries, say no when it is in the best interest of the greater good and learn how to say yes when you truly want to.

Say yes when it comes from your heart. A true gift holds no expectations, resentments or suffering. A true gift is not a loan, a debt or a loss. A true gift is a blessing to all.  

A hand up empowers both the giver and the recipient.

We can all offer gifts of many kinds and hand ups as often as we’d like. This is what makes us all strong. We all benefit from vulnerability, temporary shelter and food for our souls. We are social creatures and we all need to feel loved and supported.

When we allow others to work through their own challenges only offering them hand outs that are empowering we get to see their joy as they overcome. We get to see them as equals and equally receive from them. We get to celebrate with them. We get to be part of a community. We get to show love thru an act of compassionate service.

When we accept hand ups that are empowering when we are in need we get to see other feel valued, we get to see them as our equals, we get to give to them as much as receive from them. We get to learn and grow. We get to feel part of a community. We get to celebrate with the giver in unity. We get to be loved and show love.

Wealth or prosperity is truly abundant when we feel it in our hearts and souls regardless of our wallets.

Let go of negative or limiting beliefs about those in financial wealth or those in financial poverty. We all have the same things regardless of our bank accounts.

When we view others in a certain light based on finances alone, either good or bad we send out a message of lack into the world. We are all one. We are all worthy. We are all spirits having a human experience. We are all dealing with learning from and healing from human conditioning.

AS Buddha said: “Suffer what there is to suffer, enjoy what there is to enjoy”

What do you miss out on in life when you are always in the drivers seat?

What do you miss out on when life passes you by quickly and you don't stop to take time out and enjoy the scenery?

What can you learn by stopping and watching others?

What can you learn by living and allowing others to live?

What can you experience by being instead of always doing?

I wish you all holistic prosperity.

Jody G



Be in unity with your community.